Womanology: What, How Much, and Whom Do You Endure?

Recently a woman hit her husband with a PVC pipe. Another woman went to the police station and sought protection. A third woman broke the silence of fifteen years and rebelled against rigid customs in a big society ceremony. Many such cases happen in front of us or with us. At the core of each of those stories are intolerable or unacceptable behaviors and interactions. In our society women get verbal certificates for stamina. And secondly, the results of protest or rebellion are rarely positive. Hence it is more 'easier' to bear the conflict than to get into it. What is tolerable? Or what to endure and where to stop? Life becomes easier for those who have answers to these two questions. We associate the forced and painful word and feeling of 'endurance' with power, because it is necessary to live. The society always sets the example by giving 'good' and 'great' contracts to those who tolerate more, but as the generation changes, the ideological clarity about what and how much to tolerate increases. In science, there is a word called threshold for an extent, culmination and extreme limit, beyond which it is unacceptable. In Sanskrit, ati is a well-known expression that is taboo, which means that anything to excess is forbidden. Adapting, adapting and living in cooperation with each other has been at the foundation of human civilization but its limits must be set by each individual. In Indian society, women are expected to have more 'endurance' than men. An alarm needs to be set within ourselves before our bossing around becomes a habit, our silence turns into weakness and our endurance becomes our nature. Everyone needs to be clear enough that what is or will happen is not driven by you. Dumas and Duskas sitting curled up in some corner of the house rarely cross the threshold of the house. Sometimes for the sake of family, sometimes to preserve the relationship and sometimes because of the imagined fear of the society, crimes like domestic violence are also committed. Domestic violence is still recorded in police or court registers but cases of ideological harassment are recorded only in silence. Ask yourself daily how much, for whom and when you want to suffer. Even in emotional and intimate relationships, when the balance is not maintained, the power remains in the hands of one person and the other person comes to accept it. Intolerable or unacceptable behavior is not just verbal abuse, hitting, sexual abuse or threats. Morality is violated, honor is sacrificed or the insistence of constantly proving one's ideas right also tests our endurance. Nowhere in the world, not just India, merit lists of endurance are awarded but crimes are definitely registered for rebellious behavior caused by untimely loss of endurance. That is why what cannot be tolerated should not be prolonged.