'Doctor, I am forty two years old. There are five of us in the house. I have no personal problem with my husband, but we have quarrels because of some third person. I am really annoyed by some close people. If we are good, then we have to suffer? My husband has two other brothers in our family, but no one protects my mother-in-law. Not only that, he finds fault in everything I do. We are all elder brothers but he can insult me anytime. People say bad things about me. If those people come to us, I would think that when these 'toxic' people leave here. Especially the middle brother's wife means my elder sister is 'really toxic'. I am M.Phil in English. I didn't do the job of keeping the house and taking care of my two dears. Both my mother-in-law and father-in-law are sick. I sacrificed a lot for all of them, yet whenever I get a chance, I get 'poison-vomiting' about myself. In short, never speak well. All this makes me feel depressed. Is there such a fear that I will do something wrong and someone will speak badly about me? How to live with such poisonous people?' The excitement of Umangibehan's mind was gone. Such toxic people often come across at professional or personal level. Due to such people your life expectancy can also decrease. A woman named Maria Branias recently died peacefully in her sleep at the age of 117. She was the oldest person in the world. He did not have any major disease. Maria lived a very long and happy life. Such people are called super centenarians. He attributed his longevity to luck, good genetics and especially the habit of staying away from toxic people. A lot of research supports this. What kind of people are 'toxic'? People who annoy others are selfish and unempathetic. It means that such people do not care about the pain or suffering of others. Often relationships with such people are exhausting. Harmful to mental as well as physical health. Can cause depression, high blood pressure and obesity. Healthy relationships are more important to longevity than wealth, intelligence, and social status. Good relationships strengthen our good health. The immune system is strengthened. Slows down memory loss with advancing age. Protects against stress, depression, heart disease and diabetes. In short it helps in longevity. We all experience toxic people somewhere. It could be a friend, a partner, a relative or even a relative. Psychological research suggests three ways to deal with such people. First of all, it is necessary to identify such people. It is important to recognize the red flags in relationships with such toxic people. Meaning what are the signs that indicate being cautious in a relationship? If the person does not respect you, presents any speech or behavior with selfishness in mind, or causes physical or mental harm, these are all big signs. The second step is to set a 'healthy boundary' or 'self-control line' with such a person. Do not discuss or share certain things just thinking that they are good. Determining a safe distance from a toxic person. And the third step is to strengthen the relationships that are good. Although this may seem difficult at first, once you get used to it, life becomes easier and the chances of living a long and enjoyable life increase. Often we don't say 'no' to an unpleasant situation or choice for fear of rejection. Learning to 'say no' to toxic people or situations is imperative. Sometimes it is difficult to avoid such people, we need to minimize the reactions in our behavior and dealings with them. Often the best response is to say nothing or remain silent, but it is necessary to gradually distance yourself from such people or establish a boundary. If one or two people find a non-judgmental or open-minded listener, they become life support. And if the same persons go away, others keep meeting. Therefore, one has to impose discipline on oneself in order to stop the poison-vomiting received from them by being emotionally dependent on certain persons!
Winning Stroke We are not Mahadev who can swallow any poison down our throat.
Image Credit: (Divya-Bhaskar): Images/graphics belong to (Divya-Bhaskar).
